This is an excellent recipe for getting to the bottom of a projection. To get the most out of it, take it slowly and step by step, answering each question thoughtfully and in detail.
1. Identify a person you really don’t like or feel disturbed by.
2. Name four qualities that disturb you in this person.
3. Describe the origin of your dislike, tracing back to family experiences, formative events, key characters in your life. Identify and name these disowned qualities or parts of yourself.
4. Describe the feelings that these qualities evoke in you (judgment, disdain, uneasiness…). Are these feelings familiar, or not? How do you relate to these feelings?
5. What do you imagine you would need in order to own, work with, and heal the feelings evoked in your projection? How might you be different if the person you have a difficult time with became an ally in your life?
6. What aspects of yourself (both positive and negative) might be integrated when making the above connections for yourself?
For positive projections, pick someone you admire, idolise or love, and explore your attraction to their positive qualities.